In order to sustain anarchy “we” will have to sustain functional families, and in order to sustain healthy families “we” have to know how to get a family in the first place. Linear time progression dictates that this starts with finding a spouse. I’ve seen women make four main mistakes when they were trying to obtain a husband: not stating your goals upfront, trying to duplicate gender roles, allowing themselves to be interviewed for too long, and falling out of the interview mindset. In my experience, most women start out looking for a family and either it is scared out of them by parents or they have given up by the time men get good and ready to act surprised that there are no good women left.
Dating is an interview process and it should be viewed as such. It doesn’t have to be a bland interview process, but it shouldn’t be treated as a good time with no end goal. You are interviewing the father of your future children. And you are completely responsible for the choice you make, unless you live in a country/culture where you are essentially sex trafficked to your “spouse.” So you should treat the interview process seriously. Yes, you should absolutely have a compatible personality and love the person who you pick for this role. People who are not fit to be the father of your children who you love and want to spend time with are called friends. Do not let anyone talk you out of this mindset if you are just starting out. If you are tired of it all, get back in this mindset.